10 Ways To Spot A Liar – How To Know If Someone Is Lying
Lying is a taboo subject for the big majority of human beings. We are continuously fed with “you should not lie”, “lying is bad”. However, there comes a point in everyone’s life when a “white lie” is necessary for maintaining friendships and relationships, and I’m not only talking about the “I do love your haircut today”.
The saying “lies have legs” and the popularization of it makes our subconscious have in it the idea that liars are always caught, that’s why you should always tell the truth. But, even tho this thing sometimes happens, the chances of it happening are not higher than not happening. We, as humans, lie every single when we are in social situations. “I’m only late because I got caught in traffic” when you, in fact, could not decide what clothes to wear.
However, there are some lies that are more serious in nature than the ones I just described. For example, there are tons and tons of scammers that abuse their lying capacity and the fact that some people are prone to trusting strangers in order to make a huge profit for themselves at other people’s expenses. For this reason, it’s better to have the ability to recognize liars when you see them. There is no exact science, but here we have ten tips that can make you spot a liar. How to spot a liar:
If you ever asked a liar at least one direct question you may have noticed that at first, the liar does not want to directly lie about a subject, therefore he will not give you a direct answer at first. A liar selects his words carefully so that he does not tell the truth when asked, as that may hurt either his pride or his intentions.
That’s why, in order to be a liar you don’t necessarily need to say something that is not true, you can simply avoid questions.
A liar that is aware of the fact that he lies, knows beforehand that he is about to tell a lie. Because of that, he or she does not want to look too convinced of anything, because that can lead to you being suspicious of the fact that you are being lied to. A liar always tries to disguise his answers in pure uncertainty.
However, he can unknowingly betray himself by using quasi-lies. One example of that is “I may be wrong, but I believe that this will be the hit of the century”.
On the same spectrum to the quasi-denials, liars can use qualifying words. This means that the liar is trying to prove the fact that he or she is innocent by adding an additional message.
In this aspect, the adding is intended to qualify his words in the most proper way possible. A common example that can help you on how to spot a liar is : “From what I know, your wife is not sleeping with your best friend”
Different from the fabric softeners, a liar uses an aiming vocabulary that is mostly designed to cover up a crime. This type of vocabulary can be a big indicator that the person in front of you is lying. A person that is innocent will respond to a crime with some harsh, judging words. Stealing, maltreatment and fraud are some words that no one wants to be accused of, liars are no exception.
A true liar sees the whole wide picture, not just a spot, and that can be seen in his or her words. For a liar there is no such thing as stealing, for him there’s borrowing. For a true liar there is no fraud or mistreatment, there is just good convincement. A liar can actually believe that it can be taken as a simple mistake, not a real crime.
Another verbal sign for spotting liars is the fact that they use way too much formal language. Liars usually have their lies prepared before saying them, that’s why they are able to articulate them in a more formal manner than you would normally do.
So, the fact that someone speak in very eloquent manner might indicate that the person you are speaking to is a big liar, more so if he had the time to overthink it. Innocent people rarely use words that sound official.
6. How To Spot A Liar’s Stress Signals
As we finished the verbal signs, the next ones will be non-verbal. These signs may be more difficult to catch on because almost no one is looking at the other person’s body language, most people only pay attention to what is being said. But, if you know what to search for, you can discover the fact that liars may have hidden “words”.
Stress signals often appear because when someone is telling a lie, he’s getting more excited, it feels riskier, and everyone’s body, in those situations, responds by creating stress hormones. A response like that means that your blood pressure increases, your heart rate rises and you start breathing differently. Especially inexperienced liars and people who say big lies, get these symptoms. This also may vary because everybody’s personality is a little bit different, some people can manage stress better than others. That being said, you can spot a liar by paying attention to their breathing or to the fact that their faces become more red. Their noses can also become a bit wider and jumping from one leg to another in a repeated motion can also be a compelling sign. But it can also mean that he or she is stressed by any other thing.
If you need to know if someone is lying to you, you need to make a comparison with his behavior when he is telling the truth. It is not that easy to do in practice because you can’t really know when that person is telling the truth or not.
You need to look at that from a liar’s perspective in order to really get it. No one can lie about absolutely everything, that’s why he or she will have some truth in some of the answers given to you. A lie in its purest, strongest form is when there is not a very big difference between it and the truth, that’s why there is a pretty strong reason for the liar to partially tell the truth. If you think that someone may be lying, confront them in a setting that is comfortable to the both of you and put them to some trivial questions that you know for certain he will answer truthfully. An example of that would be “How was your last birthday?”, there is no reason to lie about that. Then you need to pay close attention to the behavior of that person and make a comparison between how he answers that versus a harder question. If you notice some change in his behavior, it may be that the person has just lied to you.
Another trick on how to spot a liar is that if you ask a question and you have doubts either the person told the truth pr lied about it, it can help to later on return to that same subject. That’s why you need to keep the subject of the question in mind, you need to make a mental mark on it. Do you, again, notice any nervous behavior, some signals of distress or any of the signs that he did verbally?
In that case there is a pretty big chance that he actually invents things on the spot or is telling a premeditated lie. That can indicate that he is a liar, more so when the signs go together.
One of the most known stories is that you can spot a liar by the fact that they avoid eye contact, this be further from the truth, and the liar knows that’s what people think. In fact, humble people avoid eye contact A LOT more than anyone else. That’s why real liars will watch you directly in the eye to convince you that they are in fact telling the truth and that they are sincere.
On the good side, people that tell lies tend to blink 8 times less than the ones who tell the truth (when telling the lie, when not they blink as any normal human being). Yes, you need to know how often does that person blink usually in order to get that, so try to use the truth technique.
When a person is lying, it’s emotions may not be consistent. A liar can have a huge fear of being caught, that’s why he is going to use fake smiles, sadness or even embarrassment. However, a person that is telling the truth may be afraid that they won’t be believed despite being truthful. In both cases, you can tell by their emotional inconsistency whether or not they are lying. If that person claims to be happy, all the signs should point in that directions, if they are not, there is something iffy going on.
Yes, all of these signs alone can’t be enough to call someone a liar, even tho they can’t prove their stand. But, more so when it comes to the every-day lie, these tips can help you recognize lies, especially if there are more signs at once. On a different note, there are certain people that are extremely good at lying and none of the signs will show, as there are some people that may show those signs because they are super nervous. In the end it all becomes guessing, but using our list can increase your chance of guessing right.
We hope that we helped you on How Spot A Liar, thank you for reading!
You can also read: 7 reasons to start using google keep.